Recognizing our vulnerability and basic goodness

Namaste poodles!

I went to another phenomenal meditation session with Tara Brach. This time, she focused on the concept of spiritual sovereignty. But before I share her message, I must give context for why her lecture was so meaningful to me.

My friend Matt Medved is currently in Nigeria working for Search for Common Ground, an NGO that focuses on conflict resolution. His Project Director Chom is perhaps one of the wisest men he's ever met. Last week, he and Matt had one of those amazing and enlightening conversations where epiphany after epiphany was had (I love those). 

Chom said that everyone walks around with "smoke and mirrors." You will never know how another person truly thinks about you or sees you. Even if you were cognizant of all of your interactions with a person, that person's own smoke and mirrors could influence how they receive you, completely independent of you. 

It reminded me of something my friend Zack said once: You can never truly know another person. So, especially in the case of romantic partners, your job is to try your best to communicate with and understand your partner.

I feel like Chom's words of advice complemented Tara's concept of spiritual sovereignty. 

***The following are my notes from her session. I tried my best to accurately record everything she said, but please don't take my words or interpretation as truth! As always, I recommend you check out her recorded sessions for yourself and draw your own conclusions.***

Tara defined spiritual sovereignty as the freedom from any limiting sense of who we are; the freedom to live from our heart. Luckily, we do have the capacity to see past the smoke and mirrors (as Chom would say). She outlined three ways of training oneself to achieve spiritual sovereignty:

1. Recognize that everyone is insecure. Once you do that, compassion can follow.

2. See the goodness in people.

3. Experience beingness instead of letting the waves push and pull you (drawing on the duck poem here; link takes you to her meditation session last week).

It's human nature to become fixated on what's wrong. We're vulnerable, so our natural reaction is to camouflage ourselves, or cover up. With mindfulness, we become more transparent. When we're not mindful, we get identified with our cover. It becomes MY jealousy versus THIS jealousy. Being mindful removes the sense of "this is me" or, as Chom might say, clears away yourown smoke and mirrors. 

Tara said one way we get into a trance (aka create smoke and mirrors) is when we really want something. When we really want something from someone, how much do we really see of that person? She used love as an example. I know when I've really liked someone, I've put up smoke and mirrors because I want them to see me in the best way possible. Said differently, I am trying to "control" how that person thinks of me; I want to make them think a certain way (that I'm awesome and the best thing ever, obviously). 

Another way we fall into a trance is when we are thick in hate and judgement. What's your sense of who you are then? When in this trance, it's very narrowing; we can't see the other person and we have no empathy.

In essence, if we're not aware, we can become needy or nasty. 

The feelings we experience when in these trances are totally real; but they're not true. The trance is our interpretation of the situation, but the content (ie the smoke and mirrors) isn't true. We fall under this trance when we start to believe it and take it personally. It's when you learn to pause that you can then recognize the trance. The trance will start to soften, a shift will occur and a space will open. When that happens you can actually begin to relate because it will no longer be relating from ego to ego.

Finally, I want to end with a routine I've started following after being inspired by Chom.

Chom said he begins each day by waking up and texting a friend a positive message. Sometimes he receives a positive text back and other times his friend's texts are negative; sometimes he doesn't even get a text in return. In the beginning, he felt hurt or disappointed when he didn't receive a reply. But now it's not about receiving. Chom said he established such a strong routine to start each day off on a positive note, that he's gained immeasurable mental and spiritual benefits. It's so simple to do! I challenge each of you to pick someone special and try this out for yourself. :)

Caroline

Cultivating Equanimity

Namaste y'all!

Yesterday I saw Tara Brach, a renowned Vipassana meditation instructor. Tara is a psychologist and expert on Buddhist meditation. It was my first time attending anything of the like and it was amazing. 

She began by sharing a poem called "The Little Duck" by Donald C. Babcock.

Now we are ready to look at something pretty special.
It is a duck riding the ocean a hundred feet beyond the surf, and he cuddles in the
swells.
There is a big heaving in the Atlantic.
And he is part of it.
He can rest while the Atlantic heaves, because he rests in the Atlantic.
Probably he doesn’t know how large the ocean is.
And neither do you.
But he realizes it.
And what does he do, I ask you.
He sits down in it.
He reposes in the immediate as if it were infinity – which it is.
That is religion, and the duck has it.
I like the little duck.
He doesn’t know much.
But he has religion.

She went on to compare the continuous waves to life--we can either fight it or we can sit down in it. As humans, we're wired to want to push away or fight unpleasantness and hang on to pleasantness. It's very hard to sense when we're getting pushed and pulled around by waves but when it happens, the best thing to do is to start naming what's going on and be open to how that feels. The duck can move with the swells of the waves (as opposed to being pushed and pulled) because it's not taking anything personally.

She also shared a quote I really liked: "A truly happy person is someone who can enjoy the scenery on a detour." It's the realization and acceptance that those moments are just as valuable. A heart that is ready for everything.

Finally, the last story she shared that I'll include here was about a man who accepted the impermanence of life and found profound love in his acceptance.

"Do you see this glass? I love this glass. It holds the water admirably. When I tap it, it has a lovely ring. When the sun shines on it, it reflects the light beautifully. When the wind blows and the glass falls off the shelf and breaks or if my elbow hits it and it falls to the ground I say, of course. But when I know that the glass is already broken, every minute with it is precious." 

Tara has many of her sessions available for free to listen/watch on her site. So far, I've listened to "Be Who You Are" and was moved to tears at least once. 

Finally, I learned of Tara through my amazing friend Zack Beach. Zack is the same friend who recommended me the life-changing book "Non-Violent Communication" by Marshall Rosenberg. I highly recommend checking out the book and Zack's blog!

Caroline

Falling stars

The theme of this post is 'falling from great heights.' I will continue to update this post as I find new amazing videos of people falling in various, epic ways. Feel free to leave suggestions of other videos in the comments section.

Austrian stuntman Felix Baumgartner stepped off a platform attached to a helium balloon 127,850 feet over New Mexico and fell more than 24 miles straight down. He breaks the sound barrier at 46 seconds in and reaches speeds of more than 830 miles per hour.



Another stuntman, Gary Connery, fashioned a suit that made him look like a flying squirrel.


World champion free diver Guillaume Nery base jumping at Dean's Blue Hole, filmed on breath hold by Julie Gautier. Music by Archive, song "You Make Me Feel."



Video made by FroschYankee from the movie Adrenaline Rush (The Science of Risk). Location: Eikesdalen, Norway. Music by Bryan Hollon aka Boom Bip, remixed by Boards of Canada.


Last Walk Around Mirror Lake - Boom Bip (Boards of Canada Remix) from FroschYankee on Vimeo.

Chilean Stuntman Julio Munoz BASE jumped off a 3,300-foot cliff in the Andes. To get the speed he wanted he did it with a motorcycle. The stunt cost Munoz more than $100,000 and required three helicopters to carry equipment.



Paris Mavroidis made an experimental animated short called "Divers." He says that he was inspired by Busby Berkeley, mass gymnastics and experimental cinema from the 20s and 30s. It was created while he pursued an MFA in Digital Arts at Pratt.


Divers (Short Animation) from Paris Mavroidis on Vimeo.

Wholphin + brain scans

Wholphin is a quarterly DVD magazine published by McSweeney's. McSweeney's is a publishing house founded by Dave Eggers. You might recognize Eggers as the author of "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius" and as the screenplay writer for "Where the Wild Things Are" by Spike Jonze.

Anywho, the idea of a DVD magazine is pretty unique to me! For example, the current issue runs 2 hours, 40 minutes, has 11 films and features:

"The Duplass Brothers celebrating friendship, Selma Blair and Jeremy Davies celebrating an awkward romance, the haunting prequel to the indie-hit Martha Marcy May Marlene, Antonio Campos' Cannes-winning Buy It Now, a couple who eat each other's pain, Jonathan Lisecki'sGayby, and seven contestants going neuron-to-neuron in a love competition!"

To pique your interest, here's one of the included films by Brent Hoff, editor of Wholphin. The video documents a love competition. The contestants are strapped into an MRI machine and asked to think about love. Scans of the contestants’s brains track activity in the brain, with special interest in a specific region called the nucleus accumbens, where three neurological pathways associated with love converge. The video briefly introduces the contestants, who explain their strategies for winning while Dr. Melina Uncapher prepares each for their scans.


The Love Competition from Brent Hoff on Vimeo.

Caroline

Long exposure photographs of fireflies

These are the most hauntingly beautiful photographs I have seen in a long time. Photographer Tsuneaki Hiramatsu took long exposure photographs of fireflies. Hiramatsu has been shooting fireflies for about 8 years now, many of which are shot in Okayama where they have firefly season

You can find more at his blog. I definitely recommend clicking on them to see their true size.

Caroline